Blog

  • Sunday night gut check

    Sunday night is a great time to find out two things (assuming that you “go to work” on Monday morning):

    1. If you’re genuinely excited about what you do for a living.
    2. If you’ve set yourself up for a productive week (even if the first item is true).

    Momentum is a powerful thing, and the energy you take into a new week is like your turn when bowling or making a play (good or bad) on a sports team.

    If you do well, the positive energy flowing keeps you in a healthy mindset to continue doing the same. If you perform poorly, you’ll have a hard time recovering.

    I remember when I was on a plane twice a week for work. Sunday night is when I would pack and consider the tasks for the day ahead: the mountain of email, the early morning flight, the weather where I was going (harsh winter, invariably…), and the fact that I didn’t enjoy the work.

    As I’ve mentioned more than once, it resulted in me making some changes, with the worst of the culminating in multiple anxiety attacks one weekend.

    When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

    -Steve Jobs, 2005 Stanford Commencement Address

    Your situation might be as dire as mine was, but reflecting on how you felt last night my be an indicator of — at the very least — some things that need to be tweaked.

  • Pacing success

    I talked about this recently, but I thought I’d deal with the idea in less abstract terms once more: a lack of planning and perspective often results in unnecessary strain to a system.

    In academics, this requires a student to cram at the last minute. Poor retention, and sleep schedule shot to hell. Long-term mastery is traded for short-term information regurgitation, undermining the point of the academic pursuit.

    When trying to reach a short-term fitness goal (looking great in a swimsuit for an upcoming trip, for example), diets often aggressively curtail the intake of essential dietary components at the expense of long-term health. Training the body to hang onto carbs and fat once they’re reintroduced to the system (see: after vacation) would seem to be a bit unwise…

    And reaching a short-term revenue goal (for the short-sighted freelancer, this is known as “making ends meet”) with a rushed scramble for contracts can result in damaged relationships and lost business.

    The situations we get ourselves into by not pacing success over the long haul are completely avoidable. By eliminating unwise, unhealthy, and unprofitable habits on the day-to-day, we set ourselves up for Ben and Jerry’s style success: manageable and even predictable over time.

    We’re used to the big push, and type-A workers love “performing under pressure” but the kind of lifestyle you deserve is one that requires long-term planning and the corresponding daily habits.

  • Developing a personal value system

    After spending a month on the road, I’m thrilled to be back in New York. Riding the subway is now second nature, but it never fails to inject a bit of excitement into the day’s travels.

    When utilizing public transportation in NYC, you are face to face with humanity. Tall, short, black, white, rich, poor, skinny, and fat are all crammed into seats together.

    A man stepped onto the subway the other night and explained that he wasn’t hungry, but that he was homeless. He needed a little money, and had a very warm disposition.

    He then shared that he was HIV positive and had full-blown AIDS.

    Was he lying? I have no idea. Was it at best uncomfortable and at most terrifying? Absolutely.

    So what do you do? Give him money? Ignore him and try to act like he doesn’t exist?

    Convince yourself that it’s not your job to sponsor his Subway Healthcare Plan™ and that he’d get what he needs by the end of the night?

    Why does it take someone breaking the proverbial ice and contributing for others to feel empowered to do so?

    Why doesn’t anyone talk about how to handle situations like this, or the method by which the right decisions in times like this are made?

    I wish I had an answer, but I struggle with these things.

  • Life and death

    Most people will not reach their full potential in life.

    I don’t mean to be dramatic, this is just a fact. What’s more depressing is that many secretly live in despair, putting on a smile for others because there doesn’t appear to be a sounding board or support system for people like them.

    People with great jobs and loving families and money and security…but a complete lack of fulfillment. When this described my life, I called going to work every day dying a thousand deaths. Well, that’s what I call it in retrospect.

    If you haven’t experienced it, it’s hard to describe the sadness and hopelessness one feels when “stuck” in unfulfilling situations. There may be additional factors such as debt and prestige and trying to please others, but there’s no immediate danger such as, say, the risk of starving to death, being homeless, or becoming a saber-toothed tiger’s breakfast.

    And so people feel foolish complaining. People come to work on Monday, log onto Twitter and talk about how fast the weekend went by and how much they’re looking forward to Friday. They feel ungrateful because “so many people would kill for their job.”

    Bah.

    You have one chance to get it right, and no one is going to fight for you if you don’t demand the happiness you deserve. Get angry, take action, and make the changes necessary to ensure your happiness (or as in my case, preserve your health and sanity).

    It’s not too late, but it’s getting there.

  • The mirror of frustration

    When no one else really understands how things should be done…

    When you’re constantly being critical of friends and family…

    When you look around and all you see is failure…

    When nothing anyone does is good enough…

    …it’s often you seeing your own shortcomings in others.

  • The gift of a chance

    Both my career and personal development (are these actually separate things?) have been immeasurably enriched by opportunities that came as a result of people taking a chance on me.

    From the time when I was a clueless intern at an Convergys in 2005, to when I was a miserable consultant at Accenture in 2007, to when I was a wide-eyed student of the publishing industry at The Domino Project in 2011, the only way I got the chance to grow and learn and fail was by someone making a conscious decision to take a chance on me.

    Advice for those who need opportunities: make the decision easy for others by mitigating their risk. Do the hard work of taking on challenges and responsibility and risk and certain death while you toil away in obscurity so that when the right opportunity comes knocking, you’ll be poised for primetime. That is, you’ll have failed enough when it didn’t matter to the point where you’re ready to fail (gracefully and catastrophically) on a much larger stage when actual budgets and reputations are on the line.

    Advice for those in a position to grant an opportunity: don’t forget when the last paragraph applied to you.

    *   *   *

    To Mary, Charelle, Michael, Lynn, William, Fran, Morris, Sabrina, AJ, Tommie, Craig, Alexis, Naajia, Pam, Ishita, Seth, Fred, hundreds of clients, and everyone who advocates on my behalf without my knowledge, thanks for giving me a chance.

    I fall short often, but I’m trying (very hard) not to let you down.

  • Preparing for the final seconds of a game

    There are a couple ways to prepare for the last few seconds of a basketball game.

    One way is to practice shooting the game-winning shot from various positions on the court, over and over, under the most challenging circumstances you can simulate. Off-balance, fatigued, one-handed, falling out of bounds, with your non-dominant hand, etc.

    You could practice catching alley-oop passes, rehearse special plays with your team, try to improve your vertical leap every month, work on your explosiveness, and study the ball-handling greats for ideas on how to move the ball towards the basket using various tricks to baffle your opponents (and delight the crowd).

    Or you could focus on playing a strong four quarters so none of those things are needed.

  • Irrespective of others

    One lesson I learned about leadership last year is that your goals should not be derailed by the inaction of others. In the context of a team setting, your leadership and the example you set must take place regardless of the goals others set and fall short on.

    This means that the completion of your goals should be enhanced by the contributions of others, but not predicated on them. Behave as if your goals are mission-critical (because they are), and as if the consistent completion of your goals is the only way you’ll get ahead (because it is).

  • Maybe you should get angry

    Everyone wants to be liked and accepted. Standing out in a crowd is terrifying, and the desire to fit in drives us to make many of the decisions we make with the way we dress and talk and live.

    “Be nice,” we’re told. But no one volunteers instructions for the corresponding disposition in business and competition. I think a different set of expectations might be appropriate here.

    Something I’ve noticed in business is that many CEOs and startup founders are not always “nice people.” Many are ruthless, temperamental, and downright angry. I don’t think it’s necessary to embody the extremes, but I do think a healthy dose of passion (even if it boils over at times) is alright.

  • Can you endorse me?

    Yesterday, I wrote a recommendation for a friend on LinkedIn. It was my pleasure to do it, I meant everything I said, and I hope it leads to her securing some solid business in the new year. She in turn wrote one for me, so my profile was enhanced a bit in the exchange.

    Recommendations are powerful, and not enough of us are proactive about procuring them from clients. Trading recommendations only took a few minutes, which got me to thinking…

    Why don’t we incorporate recommendation-writing into our normal routines? I realize that not everyone has a LinkedIn account, but an email works just as well. So we could start by spending some time every week writing brief recommendations for individuals we’ve worked with recently, moving on down the line to those we’ve worked with in the past.

    And once we’re all caught up, we can simply make this a part of the process following collaborations, contractor engagements, and the like. It requires little effort to accomplish, and can be used by the recipient for years to come.

    Why not?