Category: Career

An observation: marketers give us a new vocabulary and lens through which to experience the world. Terms like “pick yourself” an “permission slip” echo in my mind when I read articles like this now. (Read this if you’re confused).

The idea that you no longer need your idea “approved” before bringing it to market (or, in this case, publishing it) is a powerful one, and it removes from us the ability to blame our lack of success on external factors. It’s not that the lack of red tape makes success more likely, it’s that we now stand face to face with the risk required for any endeavor.

So it’s less about who hasn’t given us permission to pursue our dreams…and more about us being honest (with ourselves first, and then the world) about whether we’re actually willing to put in the emotional labor to see the dream realized.

That’s why you’re doing it, correct?

That’s why you put your name on the line every day for your project and your team, yes?

That’s why you’re putting the hours into what feels like torture at times, right?

…because the problems you’re solving are interesting and worth addressing.

…because the juice is worth the squeeze.

…because it’s work you must do.

But certainly not just because this is the trajectory on which you’ve found yourself…

…right?

The job opportunities of a few years ago are gone and never returning.

Gone are the days where a degree and nice résumé are able to consistently result in job offers. Advanced degrees, experience, and a nice haircut won’t even save you.

You know this already, though.

I graduated from college at a time when a smile and the ability to tie a tie reasonably well could land you an interview.

Some of my friends opted to stay in school for two more years to get their Master’s degree. Many of them missed the market and have had a hard time finding the type of work they deserve.

One of the things that bothered me most when I worked for Accenture is the inherent unfairness that I perceived: much of the work I did could have been done by my sister who was in high school at the time. Simple Excel trudging…but I had the shiny IT degree.

I have friends who chose to get degrees in English Literature and African-American Studies (yes, law school was a part of the plan for them…), and they would have been much better consultants than I was.

They literally could have shadowed me for two weeks, learned the job (in many cases), and replaced me without issue.

But we all know that Corporate America doesn’t work like that. Let me digress.

The tools of today (and tomorrow) are storytelling, drive, initiative, and giving a damn.

Employers (big corporations, small businesses, startups, etc.) want you to have an opinion as well. A point of view on something, in your field, instead of being a blank slate on which to absorb a bland “corporate culture.”

It’s time to usher in the new way of thinking, and I’d love to see more job seekers teaching employers what they need, rather than the other way around.

…is not how I would describe self-employment.

I work 3 to 4 times harder than I ever did when I had a job. There’s no regular paycheck, no “job security,” and no real structure imposed upon my day.

The highs and lows experienced on a weekly basis are dramatic. Backflip-worthy victories and gut-wrenching setbacks.

I learn more in a week (leadership, management, engineering, marketing, and team-building) than I would learn in three months under different circumstances.

What’s the main reason I do it, though?

The freedom.

The freedom to win, and the freedom to lose.

I own my successes in my failures.

I take responsibility for my shortcomings.

I slay the dragon every morning or watch in horror as Resistance leaves me paralyzed.

I show up every day here on my blog and hone my voice.

I wage war, break things and make art.

And I wouldn’t trade my crazy life for anything.

As I reflect on my professional trajectory and how it has been impacted by other humans, I can’t help but marvel at the influence that my mentors have had on me.

At the same time, I’m often shocked when friends tell me that they don’t have any mentors and don’t know how to go about identifying one.

The tactics involved in securing mentors aren’t particularly difficult, so it might be worth addressing the topic from a different angle: being in a position to have mentors in the first place.

• Have something that you’re (seriously) interested in: if your desire to secure a mentor at work is to avoid the harsh reality that your job is uninteresting, you might consider addressing the true source of the issue. Figure out how to make it interesting, evaluate why you’re there in the first place and whether you have to be (hint: you don’t), or — my personal favorite — quit.
• Identify exactly what it is that you want to learn: are you trying to go from selling $10,000 per quarter to $100,000 per quarter? Do you want to live life on your own terms? Are you interested in finding out how to launch a web application in a crowded space and make it successful? These can be tied to specific outcomes that frame the nature of your relationship with a mentor. Don’t conflate the role of a mentor and a life coach.
• Understand that having a mentor is a two-way street: if your idea of having a mentor is for someone to email you every week and offer insight into the things that you need to do in order to become more successful, you’re missing the point. A mentor rarely needs anything from you (e.g,, compensation), so one of the most important things you can do as a mentee is update your mentor on your progress. This is immensely gratifying to the mentor and the entire point of having one in the first place.
• You don’t need someone’s permission in order for them to be a mentor: if someone doesn’t have to time to “formally” mentor you (something that’s misunderstood and unnecessary in many cases), no problem! You can mirror their actions, and absorb their wisdom from a distance. One of my most influential mentors had no idea he was mentoring me.
• Setting expectations is important to avoid disappointment: As with any relationship that’s more than casual, expectations need to be set and there must be accountability on both sides. If someone repeatedly lets you down or is not meeting your needs, there’s no rule against having a candid discussion about expectations. If you don’t have this kind of relationship with your mentor, you might not be getting the most out of the relationship.

Further reading on the topic can be found in this fabulous post by Pam Slim.

There is a horrible, debilitating fear that saps the life out of many of my colleagues on the job. Many work stressful, demanding jobs for billion-dollar companies.

I remember it well.

Every time the email chime went off or my manager wanted a meeting or someone from my project called my phone.

Instant anxiety. Instant fear.

What did I do wrong?

What could they possibly want?

That’s it, I’m fired. I know it.

Despite these fears being imaginary and exaggerated, they feel so real.

Termination, disapproval, embarrassment, failure, poverty, rejection, and the unknown.

You deserve better.

Oof.

On the first project of my first (and last, now that I think about it) job after college, I was greeted by the most culturally diverse team I had ever seen. The US, France, Puerto Rico, China, Egypt, Pakistan, India and Brazil (I’m probably forgetting someone) were all represented.

It was beautiful.

Dozens of languages spoken. Disparate life experiences. Different motivations and expectations. It was an incredibly valuable learning lesson for me, and how similar (yet different) we all truly are came into focus for me in a powerful way during this time.

No lesson here, just sharing.

My friend Lauryn is looking for an intern to help build something amazing at Squidoo, and I wanted to post it here in case this opportunity is of interest to you.

I had the opportunity to work alongside Lauryn at Domino, and I’ve watched her truly come into her own. I hope you’ll get a chance to hear her story first hand.

Without further ado!

Hey guys–

I hope all is well. I’m reaching out to some of my friends to see if they might know someone interested in a biz dev opportunity at Squidoo.

As some background, Squidoo is the 69th largest site in the USA with over 50 millions views a month and it’s only 5 years old.

It runs, talks and acts like a start-up and has the benefit of a power-house marketing and tech team.

Given the rapid growth, I’m looking to bring on an intern for about 6 months to do business development with me.

We’re creating the largest digital magazines on the internet surrounding a variety of topics and are looking to work with premium brands to engage our readership.

We’re literally changing the face and feel of digital advertising (for the better) and I need a team to help me build this.

The role will involve setting up high level partnerships with Fortune 1000 companies, creating the vision/strategy for our magazines and execution.

The real win, though, is that the intern will be in a position to make money for themselves or any company they go to…

If you know of someone who could use this boost, please let them know. They can contact me directly.

Here also are a few tweets that you can post if you want to help spread the news and help me out in the search. No obligation to post of course. 🙂

Now Hiring: @Squidoo is looking for a rock star biz dev intern. Only the bold need apply. Contact @heylaurynbee if interested.

Wanted: Biz Dev intern for @Squidoo. Change the face of advertising for the better. Only the bold need apply. Contact @heylaurynbee

Thanks in advance!

—
Ciao,

Lauryn Ballesteros

VP of Sales
Squidoo
www.squidoo.com

[Read parts 1 and 2 of this story]

I had two choices.

I could either make some noise about the situation and tap into my network of people in the company with influence, or I could roll with the punches. It was a tough call and I was battling some conflicting motivations, so I decided to enlist some help.

Seeking counsel

A mentor of mine within the company is a Senior Executive, and I decided to seek his feedback on the situation. Despite his hectic schedule, he always made time to chat. Let’s call him Craig.

I caught Craig up on the situation in Pittsburgh and how it was a little out of my control at that point. He made himself available in case he needed to “make a call” on my behalf, but I didn’t want to involve him in my episode of The Real World: Accenture.

We talked through the pros and cons of leaving, how I might be a better fit for a smaller company, and about working for Accenture in general. Craig was connected to a few guys who ran a small consulting firm in Atlanta, and offered to make an introduction.

I didn’t want to trade one hell for another, so I politely declined.

A lateral move

A few weeks back, I had seen an internal email about a group focused on social media best practices for companies. While I’m not a social media guy^tm per se, seeing an Accenture website running WordPress (!) was encouraging (it contained information on integrating the Facebook and Twitter APIs into projects for client engagements, developer resources, and the like).

I mentioned this group to Craig, and we talked about me moving into a new position within the company (a lot more difficult than one might imagine). We also talked about what would be involved in creating a position for me.

This made me slightly uncomfortable since I was almost certain that I would make a full transition out of the company that year regardless, and I shared with Craig that I’d feel an obligation to stick with it if they did something like that for me.

I’ll never forget his response. To paraphrase, Craig said that as influential as he’d like to think he is, and with as much value as he’d like to think he adds to the company, Accenture would still keep on trucking if he didn’t show up for work in the morning.

That really stuck with me, and I share it whenever friends who feel a sense of obligation to their company use that as a reason for staying where they are.

The inevitable

We chatted a bit more about the craziest idea: me going into business for myself full-time. Craig asked me the tough questions that any mentor would ask, and he quickly determined from my answers and conviction that I was serious about making the leap.

As a matter of fact, he stopped drawing on the white board in his office, sat down, and make himself available for whatever support I might need as I made the upcoming transition.

He knew what time it was.

Onward

I decided to take the drama as a blessing in disguise. Whereas before I felt a lack of motivation on account of my comfortable position (being able to take weeks off without pay is an odd luxury), I suddenly had all the motivation I needed.

I let my Career Counselor and HR Rep know that I intended to resign, and fired off the appropriate email. There was an eerie calm in the weeks to come, as I had prepared myself mentally for the upcoming freedom and felt a burden — years in the making — lift from my life.

The actual transition to self-employment was a bit anti-climactic. Friends I made online who caught wind of me quitting generally responded with, “that’s great man, but I thought you worked for yourself already.”

Nice.

Speaking, consulting, and joining the circus

In the weeks that followed, I transitioned quite naturally to full-time freelancing. I started getting the proper rest, cleaning up my diet, and working out on a regular basis. These changes alone gave me a new lease on life, but my freedom is what I truly relished.

Business was good. There was a steady stream of work, I was getting better every day, and I couldn’t have been more sure that I made the right decision.

My friend Mike asked me if I’d speak at an upcoming conference, that he was organizing, and I happily obliged. Attending the conference were some fine folks from The Creative Circus, who eventually hired me to redesign their site.

In an interesting turn of events, they asked me if I’d be interested in teaching a basic web design/dev course there. I had an interest in teaching and they needed the help, so I agreed. It was (mostly) great.

Meeting Seth Godin

I met Ishita through Pam Slim a few months back, and helped her with a redesign of her online magazine. (Interestingly, I helped her with another redesign of the site today.) On one of our first conversations, Ishita casually mentioned that she worked with Seth Godin and asked me if I had ever heard of him.

As a matter of fact, I had purchased tickets to see him in Atlanta. That was Ishita’s next question, and she was going to invite me to the event if I wasn’t already going.

The event rolled around, and I attended a small dinner with Seth, Ishita, and some volunteers the night before the event. To say that I was nervous would be a gross understatement, which is highly uncommon for me. I’m not into hero worship, but I had (and have) a healthy respect for Seth.

During the dinner, we all took turns sharing what we were working on, and Seth provided some feedback on how we might make it better. It was great. Ishita tells me I was super-quiet during the evening and didn’t really get into it, but I never really liked Ishita anyway.

The first domino falls

This post changed my life.

Reading it significantly altered the course of my life’s trajectory, more specifically. I remember thinking to myself that I didn’t quit my job so I could live a boring life. The day the submission was due (well…the wee hours of the morning, technically), I sat down at my computer and cranked away on my submission.

The questions were ridiculous, and I had a great time applying. I didn’t have any experience in the publishing industry, but I didn’t consider that to be a bad thing. I checked my application for typos, took a deep breath, and clicked Submit.

You all know the punchline by now: I was hired and moved to NYC less than a month later. My life has been a roller-coaster since then, in the best possible way.

Meanwhile, in Harlem…

I’ve been finished with The Domino Project for four months now, and I work full-time on 1) helping authors sell more books online, and 2) making websites faster.

This has been an improbable journey, and I don’t even recognize my life anymore. I’m planning my first international trip (that’s right, I’ve never left the country), I’m doing exactly what I want to be doing, and I have the freedom to come and go as I please.

The adventure has been much less about quitting my job as it has to do with living life. I have friends who are killing it in Corporate America, and they love what they do. It wasn’t a good fit for me, and I’ve had countless discussions with people who experienced the misery that I did.

My passion for freedom and the desire for others to be liberated from the confines of a miserable existence is culminating in the Free Minds Movement, where Pam and I are thinking through how to tackle the issue head-on.

I don’t know what these next few months are going to look like, but I see some bright days ahead.

[Read parts 1 and 2 of this story]

[Read parts 1 and 3 of this story]

I flew into Pittsburgh that week a broken man.

It was an odd combination of shame, relief, and fatigue, but the anxiety was gone. I actually felt better than I had felt in months since the burden of my secret unhappiness was lifted.

It was in these moments that I started to feel a new outlook taking root: one that would no longer allow me to subject myself to continued unhappiness ever again.

The week was clipping along at a nice pace, and it was made easier because (irrespective of my narrowly-avoided mental breakdown…) I was flying to Phoenix that weekend for LiftOff with Pam Slim and Charlie Gilkey.

I know, right?

I was close to my teammate Chris during this time, so I filled him in on the fact that I’d be taking a week or two off, the fact that I almost died, etc.

Chris was younger than me and relatively new to the company, but he was a rising star on the project and I had no doubts that he could hold down the fort in my absence.

The world’s most awkward conversation

My manager at the time was a tall, headstrong, middle eastern man. He was a no-nonsense guy with many years of experience in corporate IT consulting. Let’s call him Fahim.

Because that’s his name.

We scheduled some time to chat about what was going on, and we commandeered an empty conference room when the time came. I took a deep breath and tried to explain the high points of what I was experiencing, and how I felt like some time off might be best.

Fahim was nodded understandingly as I meandered through my thoughts. When it was his turn to speak, Fahim shared how many consultants had felt the way I was feeling at the time. He cautioned that some of them make the mistake of quitting on a whim and have to come crawling back for a job a few months later.

“I’d apply to work at Starbucks before I came crawling back to this misery,” I said to myself. It wasn’t a knock on Starbucks, either. I just hated what I did for a living.

As we were talking, the lights in the conference room went out. The door was closed, so it was pitch black. As I prepared to fumble towards the door, Fahim casually dismissed the situation and instructed me to continue talking.

O_O

So we pressed on. In complete darkness. Nothing awkward about that at all. Thankfully, the power came back shortly thereafter, and we were able to continue the train wreck under the fluorescent illumination of the conference room.

The agreement is that I would take two weeks off and keep everyone posted about what I intended to do after that.

My life as a traveling consultant was typically spent onsite (see: in a different city) four days per week, with me returning home (or at least going somewhere else for business or pleasure) on Thursday.

And as I mentioned, I was scheduled to attend LiftOff, so I departed for Phoenix instead of Atlanta that week.

LiftOff Retreat

This transformational experience of LiftOff deserves its own post, so I’ll just give you the highlights:

• I’m still in touch with the folks I met during the retreat.
• I can trace between $10K and $20K of revenue that came as a result of my attendance (specifically, business derived from projects I came across through other attendees).
• When I look back at videos of myself at LiftOff (shattered emotionally, 30lbs. heavier, and a bit unsure of myself), I see a completely different person.
• There wasn’t anything in particular that I took away from the experience that helped me, so much as gaining the support system of crazy people who were in my corner. That’s all I needed.
• During LiftOff, I booked three new clients.
• Less than a month later, two of the clients had bailed on account of money issues.
• The third client had plenty of money, but not enough time to stick with the work we were doing, so I fired myself.
• The plane ride home from LiftOff is when I decided that I was definitely going to quit.

The ramp up

Upon returning to Atlanta, I started dipping into my Paid Time Off (PTO) so I could get my head together, ramp up business, and generate enough revenue to kiss my job goodbye. I also calculated what my emergency fund looked like in the event that I needed to live off of the savings.

During this PTO, I was able to work from home without being bothered with project stuff, I had time to focus on my web design/dev work, and the stage was set to take off like a rocket.

How did it go you, you ask?

Not too well. As it turns out, I picked up a lot of bad habits over the years. The most sinister one — an issue that I have to be mindful of to this day — is sitting in front of the computer even when I’m not doing anything productive.

This is dangerous is because a full-time job and steady paycheck is not (generally) impacted by an intermittent lack of productivity. Self-employment, however, is completely tied to personal productivity.

As a matter of fact, I’ve found that success as a freelancer and entrepreneur is almost completely correlated with self-awareness and self-discipline. There is no separation of how you feel and how well you work.

I took on a few projects, but they languished. I had neither the motivation nor the discipline to knock them out like I needed to. I think it’s because I was still suckling from the corporate teet and not actually in danger of starving to death.

Not yet, anyway.

The drama

Throughout my time off, I had weekly contact with my manager, HR Representative, and Career Counselor. I let them know how things were going, kept them apprised of my timeline (when I thought I might be back working), etc.

Fahim and I made tentative plans to chat one day, and for whatever reason, neither of us picked up the phone or cared enough to reschedule.

I wasn’t too terribly interested in talking to him about the situation in the first place, so I let it ride. What happened the following week however, was completely unexpected.

I got a call from my HR Representative asking me if I had been looking for projects. Perplexed, I reminded her that I was still technically on the project in Pittsburgh, and that I was just taking some time off. She informed me that I was being rolled off the project.

As it turns out, Fahim took me not calling as me not wanting to be on the project anymore. Instead of confirming this with me, he mentioned it to the person responsible for staffing the project, and this set off a chain of events that I lacked the political influence (you don’t think success in Corporate America is about skills, do you?) to derail.

Fabulous.

I felt like my career was being hijacked. My conversation with Fahim resulted in the obligatory apology and acknowledgement of him being a bit trigger-happy, but this was little consolation considering the implications of his actions.

Part of me was upset, and part of me didn’t care enough to do anything about the situation. What bothered me most is that being unstaffed meant that I’d need to start looking for another project much sooner than I had anticipated (or risk termination).

I wasn’t ready to be fired.

This is another reason my memories of Corporate America are not pleasant: there’s always an element of fear. Of not being in control of your destiny. Of external factors determining your course. Never again.

[Read parts 1 and 3 of this story]