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It’s easy to get swept up in the current of the popular opinion. Ideas get passed and retweeted and shared through the social web with very little friction.

But while the majority of the idea-consuming masses race to present the latest regurgitated idea to those whose attention they hold, it’s our responsibility as thinkers and leaders to set the trends that get discussed.

We don’t do this for the sake of being talked about, we do it because we must. Who better than you?

When I observe the technologies and inventions that are moving industries forward, it’s evident that intense next-order critical thinking has taken place.

Your ideas might need to incubate and develop in a way that prevents you from publishing a quick tweet or status update about it, but that’s the point.

Pillars, not pebbles.

The difference between good writing and great writing is dramatic.

Putting together words on a page isn’t particularly challenging, but making words leap from a page and transporting the reader to the destination of your choice requires both a strong command of language and thousands of hours of practice.

I can tell when I’m in the flow of good writing because it feels less like tapping keys and more like playing an instrument. Ideas take shape and get chiseled into prose with what feels like effortless, dancing keystrokes. And the editing process feels less like work and more like polishing.

This isn’t to say that I’ve arrived as a writer, but I can certainly see improvement over the years. As a matter of fact, I cringe when reading some of my old posts so perhaps I’ve gone from abysmal to decent. Growth is growth, leave me alone.

Artists who have mastered their craft take the mechanics of their work and create an experience with it. Atop the mechanics sit passion and empathy and storytelling and taste and style.

Unnecessary elements are removed (or never get included) so once the finished product is shipped, the signal is clear and makes contact with the world in a powerful way.

Your taxi driver probably didn’t wake up envisioning life as someone who shuttled busy humans from destination to destination. It’s both possible that they fell into the job one day and stuck with it…or that they never dreamed of having the honor of meeting so many new people while earning a living wage. The point is that we don’t know.

The barista rolling their eyes at your fancy latte order might not just be another entitled millennial, they could be emotionally precluded from serving you because of issues at home. We don’t know if she’s working to put herself through community college and helping to supplement the income of a broken home and an injured guardian.

The customer interested in your product probably has very little interest in your product because you decided to use node.js and coffeescript, they might just be looking to increase their revenues in order to pay into their child’s college fund.

The Apple Store customer service representative did not wake up this morning determined to solve your problems, nor do they care that you’re spending money that you didn’t anticipate shelling out in order to obtain a replacement iPhone.

The person who fails to hold the elevator for you might not have seen you coming, and they certainly aren’t aware that you’re running late for an important meeting after getting a terrible night’s sleep.

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.
—?

No one really cares about what’s going on in your life, people are self-interested above all things. Once we accept this fact and develop a sensitivity to it, the better we can navigate interactions with other humans.

In college I used to read this book repeatedly, and it had a profound impact on both my academic and professional trajectory. I learned to speak and think in terms of what others wanted, and there were few doors that didn’t open for me as a result of it.

Cultivating this empathy informs everything from my sales copy to how I write here on the blog to how I make conversation with strangers. I don’t possess too many special talents but if there’s one skill I’ve tried to hone over the years that I’ve found to be valuable, it’s this.

I really can’t afford not to be good at this, and neither can you.

Much of my non-technical reading is geared towards personal improvement and expanding my thinking. Whenever there’s a lapse in my reading or habits that drive me forward, my awareness is re-awakened to the fact that there’s so much that I’m not doing.

This touches everything from how I’m communicating with customers to how I’m goal-setting to how I’m thinking about problems to how I relate to the world around me. There are emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual implications.

This brings me to the idea of my “resting rate of improvement” which predictably drops to zero when I fall out of the habit of [insert habit that moves me towards my goals].

And the point of all this is to 1) reach a level of progress and improvement below which I never fall and 2) reduce the likelihood that I fall off the horse in the first place.

[You could also make the case for a third item, which would be mitigating the impact of the second item, and how to lose as few cycles as possible in the interim.]

I purchased a smoothie from a street vendor near my office in NYC recently, as I often do. Strawberry, banana, pineapple, and blueberry. It was gonna be a good afternoon.

I handed over whatever ridiculous amount of capital it takes to purchase such a drink in New York, and the lady emerged after a moment with a wad of cash.

I was a bit irritated that she handed me a clump of bills in such disarray, but since you are required by law to be texting while walking anywhere, I had no choice but to stuff the bills in my pocket and deal with them later.

After all, I had a smoothie to drink.

That night, I unload the day’s detritus from my pockets and noticed that I had been given a $2 bill in the wad of cash I was handed. Imagine my delight! I hadn’t seen one in years, so I examined it closely.

Well. My delight quickly turned into anger, as I determined the bill to be an obvious counterfeit. It didn’t even feel like money! I spent the next day or so imagining sassy ways to return the bill to the lady, snarkily informing her of my findings. So that’s why she handed me the wad of cash like she did, I thought to myself. Hmph.

Above all, I was enraged at her audacity and short-sightedness. I had probably spent fifty dollars with her over the past few months and was becoming a regular. What does she gain by offloading a counterfeit bill to me? All bad.

I kept the bill without returning it (in part because I hadn’t decided on how to break the news to her, and in part because I wanted to write about it and possibly snap a decent pic once I had the proper lighting), and found myself thinking about it when grabbing dinner last week.

I pulled the bill from my wallet and asked the cashier if it was a counterfeit like I suspected. He informed me that it was actually authentic (and also imparted some knowledge that will be useful should I decide to enter into the money laundering business).

I was shocked. I had spent the last week railing on this woman in my mind, and ended up being completely wrong about my assumption. Humbling.

Humbling.

It’s not hard to understand what’s at stake when you refuse to realize your potential. Failing to awaken the greatness inside of you is a travesty and a remarkable waste of your talents. You get it.

Something similar with unexpectedly unpleasant consequences is starting down the path to your dreams but then chickening out mid-leap.

1. If you abandon an unfulfilling career to join the circus but stop short of auditioning for the trapeze artists position that you want and instead settle for something you feel more “qualified” for (balloon animal…engineer?), then you’ve missed the mark.
2. If you dream of starting your own business or passion project but allow fear and Resistance to convince you to offering services in the industry from which you defected, you’ve missed the mark. [Example: an associate at a law firm who quits to pursue painting, but ends up offering freelance legal services because it makes more sense and is easier to explain to the in-laws. “Hey, I still work for myself!”]
3. If you dream of working for a startup and settle for a biz dev position instead of User Unteraction lead because you don’t know jQuery and you’re ashamed to share your Photoshop comps to the hiring manager, you’ve missed the mark.

It’s also dangerous to start on the path of living your dreams and play by the rules that govern your former, safer life. There’s no sense in facing your fears for a season instead of becoming the kind of person who thrives in the face of calculated risk.

Being in the neighborhood of your dreams might feel like a victory, but if you’re going to spend the same number of years on the same planet on this plane of reality regardless, then why not give it all you’ve got?

The more I study life and success, the more it becomes apparent that the only battlefield we have in common is the mind. Bring it under subjection and the world is your oyster. Fail to develop a strong mental resilience, and it can be your undoing.

I’ve always loved the idea of doing the impossible. The phrase is perhaps a bit overused, but you have to be doing (or saying or thinking) something unreasonable in order to win. If you’re a heavyweight boxing champion, you might put it like this:

“Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they’ve been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It’s an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It’s a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.”

—Muhammad Ali

Sounds good to me.

[Shouts out to Les for bringing this quote to my attention today, and to Nicky for almost making me decide against publishing this post on account of his.]

A friend hit me up for some feedback last week and I thought I’d share.

Disclaimer: I’m not a startup advisor (except when I am), nor do I coach people (except when I do), so take it for what it’s worth.

So my friend — let’s call her Jasmine, since I think that’s a beautiful name and I like the idea of having a friend named Jasmine — is considering a project that would provide a service to the technology community in her city. It’s part startup directory, part job board, part connection platform. There’s a successful model for it here in NYC and this serves as the inspiration.

Jasmine has shopped the idea around to those who stand to benefit from it, and has been met with considerable resistance. Chiefly, as it turns out, because there are a lot of people who want to be the first to execute a project of this sort and they feel threatened by my friend’s interest in it.

To add another layer of complexity, Jasmine is in a bit of a holding pattern with her career.

She quit her well-paying job to strike out on her own in search of work that fulfills her. She’s known in social circles for having a competency in one particular aspect of digital media, but it’s unclear if this is what will “put her on” if you will.

When probing further with the idea, I found out that there are a few people interested in helping out, and that there is not yet a clear path to monetization.

So. My feedback was as follows:

1. No one’s opinion of the idea really matters, and asking the wrong people (those who want to ship it first) for their opinions seems to be a bit incredibly counter-productive.
2. If this isn’t a business, then what’s the point? You’re at a point in your career when your next move really should put money in your pocket and earn you respect in your industry, so anything not likely to hit that mark should be cast aside immediately.
3. There will obviously be some political backlash in your city’s (relatively small) technology community among those who want to pull this off. To be dramatic, at the risk of oversimplifying: are you willing to be hated until you’re loved?
4. Is this just the idea of the month or are you committed to seeing this through? You’re going to have to slog through months of thankless work in order to even gain some initial traction, and it’s possible that this still might fail.
5. Along the lines of the last point, it will be a travesty if, knowing what you know and having worked through these questions, after getting people excited about this idea and hacking away until it’s no longer interesting, people visit the website in six months and it has become a GoDaddy parked domain page. If you do it, see it through.
6. Having a few people interested in helping out might not actually be a good thing. If this is a business (and I hope it is) then are you prepared to pay these people? Will they all be happy to toil for free while you earn from it? Or has the expectation about money not been set at all?
7. Unless you’re going to learn the technologies required to execute this project, you’re going to be looking at hiring a developer to help make this happen. Have you thought through this?

I don’t need to know the answer to these questions, and neither do you. But I think the questions need to be addressed before another step is made.

Just happened upon this section of a restaurant’s website.

Emphasis mine:

Our delivery and credit card minimum is $10. Before ordering, we ask that you please consult our maps to see if you fall within our delivery range. Due to the high volume of deliveries, we can only make exceptions within reason, in which case we ask that you meet a $40 delivery minimum. We charge a 10% delivery fee for orders over $100.

Madness.

Sean “P Diddy” Combs is by almost all accounts a terrible rapper.

But despite his shortcomings as an emcee, he has managed to build one of the most successful and influential hip hop empires in history. Not to mention his restaurant, alcohol, and clothing ventures. Forbes estimated his 2012 net worth at over half a billion dollars.

That’s billion with a “B.”

Germaine “Canibus” Williams, on the other hand, is an emcee who rose to prominence in the 90s, and is regarded among hip-hop enthusiasts as one of the most talented lyricists of our time. I’ve been a fan for years and despite his lack of commercial success, he’s been an influential figure in hip hop who was known for outshining other artists when contributing verses to their songs.

Last I heard, he had been discharged from the ARMY for being caught with marijuana. And I’m not sure his music career is faring too well, either.

These are extremes, sure, but I’m making a point. I love examples from the music industry because it’s easy to gauge influence and success and trace the arc an artist’s career.

Seems to me that the thing you’re judged by might not be the thing that matters, and it’s more important than ever for artists to determine what their personal goals are when striking out.

Do you want to be famous? Rich? Respected? Accepted by most or just the people who get the joke? As an artist, I think it’s dangerous not to decide. And as a marketer, I think it’s foolish to make snap judgments without digging deeper.

The more I learn, the more I disagree with those around me about why things are the way they are. I think this has to do with people wanting to fit in and be accepted (it’s en vogue to talk about how good or bad something is when that’s the popular opinion, but it’s annoying to deal with a contrarian all the time).

As it relates to my career, I’m learning what the role that reputation and excellence play. You can be popular and well-liked and influential…and completely broke. This was one of the most interesting things I learned when I started making my living online — it’s a complete house of cards out here.

So my talent and natural abilities matter, sure, but if they’re not aligned with what matters in the context of those who need me (my team members and customers) then it’s for naught. People remember excellence.

I call my CEO the dark horse of web performance because he’s not a public figure in that he’d be recognized walking down the street, but the people who know him (large companies who have hired his firm, the hundreds of thousands of customers who run their site using technologies he architected) respect him immensely.

Because he’s got excellence in muscle memory so to speak.

That works.