Yesterday’s post made me think of two experiences I’ve had as a manager that stuck with me over the years.
The first is thanks to Shaila, who was a trusted collaborator and co-facilitator for several workshops. I once asked Shaila for feedback, and she delivered it with such care, thoughtfulness, and truth that it deepened the level of trust between us.
She didn’t shy away from the truth, nor did she deliver it flippantly. The feedback was fair, direct, and considered. Instead of the instinct to secretly convince myself of how wrong she was or to defend myself, I basked in the power of the truth delivered with care.
By contrast, I’ve seen and experienced feedback that causes irreparable harm to relationships, either because of the shaky relational foundation that couldn’t bear the weight of the truth or because of the careless way in which the feedback was delivered.
Good feedback, delivered well, at the right time, from a trustworthy source, is a gift.
The second experience was when I worked with Erika, who brought such depth and creativity to the work that I got off our calls thinking, “So that’s what excellence in my role could look like.”
Erika and I collaborated on large-scale training rollouts, where we had to consider factors such as geography, language, dialect, class, psychological safety, and dozens of other elements that contribute to delivering effective global training programs.
And even though the experience she brought to the table could have made me feel like an intern on my first job, the grace and playfulness she brought to bear always made me feel like a peer.